Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Scorpions On A Plane

Just in time for the summer movie season, the sequel to "Snakes on a Plane" has a story to be based on..."Scorpions on a Plane."
Jenny and Roger thought their family trip to Vermont was going to be a dream come true. Little did they know that lurking on their flight was a killer...and he was ready to put a "sting" in their step.
Coming this July, Donald Sutherland and Kathy Bates star in "Scorpions on a Plane."
It's going to be eight legs worth of terror..."Jenny, why are their scorpions on this damn plane and who is that angry black man with the gun."
Even if it does sound impossible, a scorpion on a plane is now a reality. Though the story doesn't involve death or Samuel L. Jackson, it does bogle the mind to think about how this could happen. David Sullivan and his family were on a flight home to Vermont from Chicago aboard United Airlines. He awoke from a nap and noticed that his leg was numb and figured it was asleep. Sullivan describing the sensation said, "My right leg felt like it was asleep, but that was isolated to one spot, and it felt like it was being jabbed with a sharp piece of plastic or something." He ignored it until he got to baggage claim when he felt the sting again. This time, Sullivan rolled up the cuff of his pants and the scorpion fell out.
The fate of the scorpion was sealed when another person at the luggage carousel screamed and stepped on the arachnid. Sullivan scooped up the remains and took them to the hospital with him.
Dr. Stephen Leffler attended to Sullivan and noted that you don't see scorpion stings in Vermont all that often. Leffler also said, "Scorpion stings are rarely fatal, except to babies or older people with health problems. For a healthy adult, a scorpion sting can mean numbness or shooting pain, or flu-like symptoms." Sullivan reported that the next day he did feel sick.
As for the airline, they have no clue as to how this creepy-crawler made it onto one of their flights. The Sullivans found out that the plane they boarded has come from Houston. They surmised that the scorpion somehow boared the plane in Texas. A United spokesperson had this to say, "It is something that we will investigate and look into. We're very sorry for what happened. Our customer safety and security is our No. 1 priority."
I guess with all the airport employees busy looking for strange liquids and shoe bombs, a scorpion was able to get passed security. Let's just be glad this one didn't have a vendetta against the United States government. We might have had to wipe out most of the desert Southwest to destroy any scorpion-terror cells. And also, I think Sameul L. is busy right now.

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